Many people dream of getting signed to a record label, and being part of Sky-Rocket Records I have had some extraordinary applicants! So I thought I would put together a light-hearted how-not-to guide if you’re after that big deal….
- Ask for a phone audition
- Have no original material
- Believe everything you hear on X-Factor
- Think you’re a great singer because your mum told you so
- Use a bad quality home-made live video to promote yourself
- Believe you’ll be picked for a major project without ever having performed live
- Make extraordinary demands before being signed
- Expect to earn money
- Get aggressive with A&R for ignoring you
- Ask for advice and then get really snitty because you don’t like it
- Mention your criminal record for paedophilia
- Tell the A&R people that their previous signings are shit
- Put a cartoon of Mohammed on your album cover
- Sing with a lisp
- Have the personality of a dead frog
- Have a row with your band mates in front of A&R
- Expect to be a HUGE star the second your album comes out
- Truly believe you’re much better than the thousands of other hopefuls who can’t sing
I’m sure you will think of lots more ways to put off a record company, and I would love to hear them!
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